An Open Letter to FOX

By Roode

Dear, FOX Network

I hate you. I'm sorry. That must have come off rather rude. But, I sincerely hate you. Why, you may ask. You've hurt me, FOX. You've hurt good old, hard working Americans with your jackass decisions.

You've cancelled promising shows like:

• Harsh Realm
• Brimstone
• Arrested Development
• Futurama
• Sliders
• Wanda at Large
• Family Guy (but you brought that shit back as soon as Adult Swim started raking in the ratings with reruns-- after which the vast majority of episodes reinvented suck)

That's right, Jason. Be brave

And you're getting ready to axe:

• Dollhouse
• Terminator, The Sarah Connor Chronicles

Now this is a terminator I can work with.

Why do you do this to us? Do you get some sort of sadistic pleasure from providing us with some RARE decent television just to slap it out of our hands like a cookie from a small child? you meddle with the writing process, making ridiculous demands. You make ridiculous programming decisions like moving struggling shows to impossible time slots, then throw up your hands and moan "We tried." Bullshit.

I know what this is all about. We all do. It's about that steaming shit pile American Idol. That's it, isn't it? Shows that make the viewer think are too hard to maintain, right? Scripts? Writing? F that. Run more American Idol. That's gold, Jerry!

You are a bag of dicks. I want to punch you where your face lives. Too many times have I seen you deliberately sabotage shows just to give American Idol more airtime. Assholes!

There is a war in America. Every time you slaughter another decent show, the terrorists win. Not the jihad type terrorists. No. I'm talking about a much more sinister brand of nut slapping terrorists. The reality show terrorists. We've already lost ABC and CBS. We're losing ground.

So, in closing, FOX, I would like to kick you in the nuts. I want to hurt you. But, I could never hurt you like you hurt me.

Sincerely,

Roode

PS: Hell's Kitchen is OK.