I'm a Cnut - Fcuk me!

Suddenly I felt all better
I was all set to close down my blog once and for all last week. I had written a lovely 'goodbye' post and everything, all set to post itself automatically on July 22nd at the stroke of midnight. And then I packed my things and I went to the beach.

Funny thing about the beach, I wasn't there for very long before I found myself feeling all better. At 11 pm I pulled out my laptop, hijacked someone's wireless internet connection, and posted something entirely different, pushing my 'goodbye' post into Draft, perhaps to be used some other day.


Goodbye!
I wish I could post some of my many fabulous photos that I took while enjoying the ocean waves and white sands, but I left the pictures on the camera that I used which is currently not here with me. Dammit. So maybe later I'll show you some hotties and some not-hotties and some ships and the place where I nearly drowned.

In the meantime, here's something funny that I just blatantly and shamelessly stole from a guy named Jonathan Briley on Facebook:



Top 10 Colonial America Pick-up Lines

1. Shall I compare thee to a brick outhouse?

2. Wouldst thou care to join me in forming the beast with two backs?

3. Without thine companionship, dear lady, I fearest I would spend the evening with pen in hand but no parchment with which to seek relief.

4. Is this a dagger I see before me? Nay! I'm merely happy to cast eyes upon thy beauty!

5. Did thou polish your pantaloons this morn? No? I thinkest I do see myself within them.

6. O! Prithee, sitteth upon my visage, and perchance to let me divine thy weight.

7. If being a lusty wench was the act of a criminal, thou would surely be in the stocks.

8. ‘tis darkening clouds on the horizon, can you provide safe harbor for my ship of state?

9. Would you like to assist me in my efforts to repeat the recent scientific work of Sir William Herschel ( discoverer of Uranus)?

10. Tell me wench, Is thy father a farmer? For those are the ripest melons in the market this day.