I Am Nostradamus! Mary Winkler Appears on Oprah

Mary 'Shooter' Winkler
I am the predictor of the future! My record regarding Mary Winkler has been spot on thus far.

I predicted on the day that Matthew Winkler was found murdered and his wife and kids missing that she did it, she would claim "I'm the real victim. I was abused", she would get away with it, and then she'd be on Oprah with everyone all sympathetic and talking about how domestic violence is bad, except when women do it to men, blah blah.

I got it all right on the money.

Until the very last part.

Mary Winkler was on Oprah. She told her story. Or rather, she told her lawyers' story as best as she could remember it, but it has holes and she couldn't remember all the answers they gave her.

Oprah was skeptical. She wasn't buying it.

Yes, my bitches, you heard right. Oprah wasn't buying Mary Winkler's "I'm the REAL victim" story, hook, line, or sinker.

At least, that's sure how it appeared from what I saw on the local news when they replayed parts of the interview. Even the newscasters were commenting on how Oprah seemed to feel that the Widow Winkler was full of shit.

I was SOOOOOOO close. I nearly hit a home-freakin-run with this story. Who would have thought, of all the parts to miss, that Oprah would throw a wrench in and prove me wrong?

Shit!

Immediately after the airing of the interview, Mary Winkler was seen in downtown Memphis with her two lawyers drinking wine and celebrating. Her next goal, they say, is to grab her kids away from her victim's parents and keep them quiet, as they very nearly derailed her claims of victimhood once already.

After that, selling 'her' story to the highest bidder in order to profit from her crime is next on the agenda. Mary hopes to become a celebrity whose ugly face is hidden behind some famous actress portraying her on film. Charlize Theron is rumored to already be in talks with Mary's Dream Team for the rights, but producers aren't sure if Charlize can gain enough weight or be uglied up enough to pull it off. Rosie O'Donnell is being mentioned as a shoe-in, should she express interest.

But without Oprah's endorsement, it could all fall apart.