Today

I have a lot on my mind. Still, I'm not going to talk about it just now. Instead, let's just look at the far more exciting events of today and talk about that, shall we?


Governor Spitzer resigning
New York Governor and former cowboy attorney general Eliot Spitzer was busted by the IRS, of all things, for paying over $80,000 to the Emperors Club VIP call girl service for the services of America's most expensive prostitutes. His favorite, apparently, was a girl who called herself Kristen.

Kristen, that's a lovely name. I'll bet she's pretty.

Immediately upon the discovery of this 'indescretion', the New York Republican Party called for cowboy Spitzer's resignation. Many of his former targets, including Martha Stewart, who some say he put in jail for utter bullshit, are believed to also be quietly calling for his resignation. And perhaps a few other things that may or may not include bodyparts and blood.

Now, my own take on this is perhaps a bit unique, I don't know. I was raised in Alabama. I grew up Southern Baptist. And yet, given all that, my own reaction to this was simply this:

I'll bet those are some kick-ass prostitutes!

Other than that, I pretty much yawned at hearing the news. Another Democrat is caught with another hooker. So what? And he spent a lot of money on her. Again, so what? Was it the state of New York's money or was it his own? If it was his own, I don't care.

The thing is, when you join the Democratic Party it is pretty much a given that you hire hookers, smoke pot, and take illegal 'contributions' on a regular basis. This is the whole reason for joining the Democrats. It's the PARTY party. And should you ever get caught, the Party rallies around you and attacks whomever it was that caught you. "Judge not lest ye be judged" they always say, completely misusing the only verse in the entire Bible they even know. But it always works and they always get away with it. Always.

Democrats don't resign. They attack. If you ever see a Democratic politician committing a crime, run before you get railroaded into jail after a long and drawn out smear campaign designed to destroy you and everyone who ever knew you. Don't report what you saw. Just pretend you never saw anything.

Lately, though, as the Feminist Political Machine has increasingly seized control of the Party party, especially in New York, it has become increasingly ... what is the word? Religious? Intolerant? Fanatical? I don't know. You can smoke pot, you can molest children, you can hide bodies, you can do all sorts of things, but if you are a man having sex with a woman, well THAT is a crime against womyn and you are going to hell! Unless you make a sizable contribution to the National Organization for Women, that is. If you do that then your sins are absolved and you are forgiven.

Sound familiar, Martin Luther? Sure it does.

Anyway, imagine my surprise when today Mr. Cowboy Spitzer actually announced his resignation. I never thought he would. I had already tuned this story out, expecting the usual round of counter attacks and accusations against whomever had caught him. I guess the IRS is a bit hard to smear. Perhaps they are too tough even for the Democrats? I don't know.

The expression on Mrs. Spitzer's face, "Mrs" being a term no one in America is ever allowed to use without being excommunicated, perhaps told a story of forthcoming doom for Mr. Spitzer. She didn't look angry or tough or plastic like Hillary did when Bill was caught lying under oath about Monica Lewinsky. She didn't look like a politician's ambitious wife at all. She looked like an actual wife. And they both looked ready to cry.


Mary Ann Caught with bag of Pot
Dawn Wells, who played Mary Ann on the old show "Gilligans Island" was arrested for driving under the influence and in possession of a bag of pot.

Several of her friends came forward and testified that it was their pot and they had smoked it in her car. She got off with a light sentence.

The reaction to this story has been pretty light. It's a curiosity and perhaps a shock for Mary Ann to be busted for drugs. But what a testament to her friends, that they would come forward and claim the pot as theirs. She must be pretty decent to have friends like that.

Well, that's about all the exciting news I see just now. Oh sure, the U.S. economy is teetering around recession, there is crisis in the Middle East, we have an election campaign with two Democratic candidates battling it out for the nomination, and all of that. But let's face it, these two stories are the only thing anyone is really reading this week.